I just realized something. It’s going to be 2010 in several weeks. For the past 10 years, we’ve been wearing glasses for New Years parties that look something like this:
Now that one of the eye holes is going to have a “1” in it instead of a “0”… what kind of fun glasses are we going to be able to wear? I can’t see your eyes being in both the zeroes while the “1” is planted right between your eyes! Something like this:
That would look weird and you’d get all off-balance with most of the weight of the glasses shifted to the right side of your face. I believe this massive difference of weight on partiers faces, coupled with whatever mixture of Southern Comfort, Ecstasy, Keystone Light and buffalo wings they have in their system may cause a mass riot in Times Square during the New Years celebration. I’m staying home!
What about the companies that made these “2007”, “2008” and “2009” glasses? Are they going to go out of business? I would assume that those glasses probably sold out and accounted for a huge profit.
Forget all the hype around 2012… we need to be preparing ourselves for the mass hysteria that will be known as “The Massive Weight Shift Caused By The ‘2’ On One Side Of The Celebratory Glasses That Read ‘2010’ And The Absence Of Equal Weight On The Other Side Of The Glasses Worn During The New Years Celebration Causing Mass Chaos In The Streets Of New York City”… or “The Worlds Dumbest Riot” for short.