Someone Out There Doesn’t Like Me


I think on every writer’s way to making themselves heard, and if they’re heard by enough people, they’re bound to piss someone off.

My brother, a far more AWESOME and HILARIOUS writer than me, used to write for the sports section of my hometown paper and would get irate coaches or pissed off parents scolding him for something he misquoted or kids name his misspelled.

Phillip Yancy, the author of “What’s So Amazing About Grace” (an excellent book I’m reading currently), is rather fearless in some of the questions he answers about spirituality and in turn… pisses off A LOT of people.

I’ve had disagreements and arguments as a result of some of the things I’ve written but no one has attacked me personally… up until recently.  I hadn’t been so “lucky” as to have someone write something oozing with hatred for me. 

If stirring the pot is indeed part of becoming a (somewhat) successful writer… then I guess I’m on my way!

Back before I changed to my current “Hands To War” blog… I was at “Virtual Hugs”.  I changed because I wanted a new start and quite frankly… the name “Virtual Hugs” was starting to just sound a little too sissy for me.  I still check Virtual Hugs from time to time to see what kind of attention it’s getting despite the fact it hasn’t been actively updated for a while.

The other day, I had two new comments on Virtual Hugs that needed to be moderated.  If you’re not a blog writer, then this means “someone new” has posted a comment about something you’ve written.  The comments were in response to an old post I’d written almost a year ago as part of a series I’d written about my tattoos and what they meant.  Felicia had this to say about my post:

Wow. You’re a jerk. I know the “dragon lady” and her “dragon man” very well . They are really kind people oh and before you talk about peoples “weight problem” you should take a look in the mirror you’re not that great yourself. I hope you’re tattoo fades. Rude ass.

Apparently she thought of some other things to say because she made a second comment:

Oh not only that how lame could you be? A blog about your tattoos. Puhlease you do not have works of art. Oh and congrats on the nautical star you’re like so original. Typical douche tattoo.

Of course, you’ll need to read this to know what she’s referring to when talking about the “dragon lady” and her “dragon man”.  Basically, the lady that gave me the tattoo was rather large as was her husband.  While, I admit, I probably could have omitted the part about how large they were, it still didn’t take away from the fact that (a) she did a great job on the lettering, (b) she did a crappy job on the crown (c) I got the tattoo in a double-wide trailer, and (d) I was understandably nervous at my surroundings.

I responded to her comments:

Hey Felicia, you’re right… I’m not that great myself… never claimed to be. I also never doubted that the dragon lady and dragon man are very kind people. The fact that dragon lady was so large has nothing to do with the fact she was a nice person.

Fact of the matter is… this is my forum to write and I can write about whatever the hell I want to write about. So if you don’t like it… don’t read it.

This is my old blog BTW. If you wanna make more hateful comments on my current stuff go to http://www.handstowar.wordpress.com

I’m guessing she was upset that I called the dragon lady and her husband “whales”… that is a derogatory comment and for that I apologize.  Perhaps I should have called them “gigantic”.  I’m sure if you asked them they would agree with me!  It certainly didn’t seem like they were in any hurry to lose weight judging by the way her husband lounged behind an empty pizza box and gnawed on Cheetos while watching “The Last Samurai”.

The dragon lady looked nothing like this… but she did tattoo me with a sword… okay maybe not… nothing in this picture represents my tattoo from her at all come to think of it

I certainly am not one to judge people and their problems because I have plenty of OCD, anxiety and depression problems that I skewer myself with often but I was just explaining things in my post “as I saw it”.  My impressions of their location and their physical appearance had nothing to do with the job she did or the kind of person she is.  Dragon Lady was indeed very nice as was her husband.  I have no problem with them as people and I’m sure they deal with their own demons as we all do every day.  But the fact remains, I wouldn’t recommend her if you wanted to get a tattoo and I would recommend her to move her shop out of her double wide and work on eating a little healthier if she wants to build her business.  I’m sure they’d both feel a lot better about themselves.  That’s not judging… it’s the truth and sometimes the truth hurts.

Also… while a nautical star tattoo may not be particularly unique, I don’t think it completely classifies me as a douche.  She obviously didn’t read the most recent post about all my newer tattoos either because they are decidedly unique and “non-douchey”.

The true mark of a douchebag I suppose

Okay… I’m done.

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19 responses to “Someone Out There Doesn’t Like Me

  1. My comment is awaiting moderation…. But wait no more–here it is. Fun, fun! I like deflating defensive characters.

    “I like that Felicia calls you out for being mean to her friends, but includes this sentence: “I hope you’re tattoo fades.” She hopes YOU ARE tattoo fades. Um, what? You got told by the Grammar Princess apparently, Chris.

    Also, Felicia, are you not offended that he pointed out they lived in a double wide trailer? Because that is offensive to all the wonderful people who live in mobile homes and are not running an ILLEGAL business out of their wheels of comfort. (Let’s call them “criminals” and “tax burdens” and call my man Chris “irresponsible” for not going to a real artist, instead of a wanna be with no motivation to live somewhere they can be an actual professional instead of a sketchy couple with paranoia issues.

    And to prove to you how “rude ass” and “douche” you are, she points out to you that it’s not nice to call people names. Clever! That’s so nice of the Dragon people’s defender to illustrate hypocrisy for us with such clarity and originality. I like when people go above and beyond.

    What’s supposedly more lame than writing a blog–a personal outlet for your musings–about your tattoos and their meanings? A random female supposedly named “Felicia” who misuses colloqiualisms mid-sentence (“oh”) and gets mad reading a blog she only has to click away from. Go to your friends’ tattoo shop website instead! Wait, is it still under construction–what with their unfortunate health department violations now that it’s legal, and outstanding warrants?

    • chriskoenig4324

      Wow… that was awesome Stephanie. Thanks like one of the coolest responses to any post I’ve ever written. Here’s hoping that Felicia reads this! Thanks for reading.

  2. I do love the above comment! Also, I just read the post that Felicia commented on and don’t really see the need to be so hateful! You did finish by saying she did a good job! Plus, I personally like hearing about the tattoos and the stories behind them (probably why I like watching LA Ink)! I am also very glad to find that post b/c I noticed the M on your finger in another picture and wondered about it. I’ve actually also read a couple of things recently about people being hateful and other things on the internet and how it’s increasing because you don’t have to say it to their face. I love reading your blog and will continue to do so. 🙂

  3. How could I possibly top what Steph Scott said…Other than you truly have an amazing heart and had she read further she would see that you are in no way mean spirited..your incredibly funny, loving and like to chat about boobs. Love you for the EXACT MAN that God created in you. Thank you for being my best friend and wow so luck because I can also call you my HUSBAND 🙂

    • chriskoenig4324

      Well… thanks honey. Thank you for being a part of my life forever! Thank for marrying a “5” like me!!

  4. You’re bound to piss someone off eventually. Hold your head up high.

    Btw, I think your tat looks pretty sharp.

  5. well flip, everyone has covered it. Kris your blog is awesome, and in no way are u a mean spirited person. if everyone was as kind as you are, this world would be a nicer place. I mean even your reply to this “hater” was very polite. So keep on writing, people “hating” just means your writing is being felt in peoples hearts. im glad i found your blog, i enjoyed reading it. thank you Kris, cheers!

  6. Don’t sell yourself so short, Chris. You piss me off all the time! heh heh…

  7. I do not defend the comment because it was rude and inconsiderate itself.

    However, of your 8 tattoo stories, the only one that included any details about the artist was the one in question. We know nothing about any of the other artists other than the shop they worked at.

    Therefore, calling them “whales” and giving them nutritional advice, when you didn’t do anything remotely similar with the other artists, is centering them out for being overweight, and what does that have to do with the tattoo?

    Ask yourself, if the physical attributes of the other seven artists were not important enough, why mention it for the eighth?

    Again, I am not defending the manner in which the comments were presented, but I think they raise a valid point about what you wrote (or didn’t write, as the case may be).

    • chriskoenig4324

      Touche SciFi Dad. Thanks for reading. The stories themselves were about not only the tattoos themselves but the stories behind them. I had some back story on each of the tattoos I believe. The fact of where I got this tattoo and who did the tattoo was particularly memorable… so I wrote about it. With that being said… I agree that calling them “whales” was not nice and I apologized in my recent post.

      One thing about having a blog is having the ability to state your own opinion. I’m also not stubborn enough to realize when I might have overstepped my bounds. I could have mentioned her being large because I thought it was rather pertinent to the story without using a derogatory term such as “whales”.

  8. In response to “others” comments SERIOUSLY how do movie reviews, loving your daughter and loving GOD, PISS PEOPLE OFF?? You always support and appreciate “others” blogs…dont understand why they cant do the same.

  9. Anonymity makes it easy for people to say things they might otherwise say. Good times.

  10. Minor detail here….but doesn’t “whale” mean a whole other animal (pun, I know…) in Vegas? Like, you know, really super wealthy and probably doing pretty much ok? Like, I’m thinkin’ “villa” rather than “double-wide” here. So, um, I suppose since one reader seemed to want to go out of her way to be offended, I’m, like, lookin’ fer something totally positive here, OK?

    Teehee…..I liked your stories. I really think the description of the artist, her husband and their home/shop was all part of the story of that particular tat. No appology necessary.

  11. Mollien (Mom) Koenig

    Steph is a girl after my own radical grammarian heart…Haha!! Loved the “you’re tattoo” comment! I cringed when I read it the first time. Even looking at it now, I’m getting strange sensations up and down my spine. And apparently Felicia hates for people to call other people names, unless, of course, it happens to be her doing it. Classic!

  12. One of my favorite things about people who tend to write hateful comments on the internet is that they CAN’T SPELL or punctuate correctly. Are they perhaps attacking other people to compensate for being idiots? Perhaps.

  13. Hi! I’ve been reading your blog for like a year now, and this is my first comment.
    I blog on my family’s blog, and we get our fair share of “Trolls” and I so WISH I could answer those snarky jerks back like they deserve. It’s so nice to see someone who doesn’t have to be all sensitive to the people who live their lives looking for a reason to be rude.
    Btw, you always make me laugh. I love your blog!

    • chriskoenig4324

      Hey Deanna! Thanks so much for the comment! I’m really happy you’ve been reading me FOR A YEAR!! Wow. I’m completely flattered. I’m happy I can make you laugh. Thanks so much for reading…

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