Times Are A-Changin’ (Again)


Preface:  I absolutely have no qualms with kids in day care at all.  Personally for us… it didn’t work so don’t think I’m judging anyone by the decisions they have to make.

It was almost a year ago when I wrote about Bunny’s transition from career woman to stay-at-home mommy.  I was initially opposed to the idea… having to survive off my income alone scared the crap out of me.  We had survived as a couple on dual income (or DINKs i.e. Dual Income No Kids) ever since we’d been together.  Now that a beautiful child was in the mix I couldn’t imagine how we would ever survive without two incomes.

Fortunately, the good Lord had us in his crosshairs. 

I was initially opposed.  I thought she should at least try to find another job.  “How are we going to survive without two FULL incomes!” I’d argue.  “Tons of kids go to day care every day and there’s nothing wrong with them!”

Through the tears welling up in her eyes, she would convey to me how much she hated leaving DLG with someone else.  It should be her responsibility to raise our child… not someone else.

My priorities were indeed all jacked up.

But they changed.

Bunny is with DLG every day and loves her in a way that no day care worker could ever convey.  Would DLG have received “love” from day care workers?  Yes… but it wouldn’t be mama’s love.  That is more precious than any salary.

My heart became increasingly softened to the idea as I watched DLG grow and become (what I truly believe) the most beautiful, most intelligent, most loving little girl in the world today.  She’s almost two now with the vocabulary to match most three year olds.  She can count to ten, sing part of her ABC’s, sing Yo Gabba Gabba songs, remember friends names and identify her mother’s boobs every time Daddy asks where they are (much to his amusement).

Tears of joy stream down my face in thanks to her for making me a believer.  I can’t believe I was ever opposed to her being a stay-at-home mom.  I was undeniably selfish.

It’s funny though how things have a way of working themselves out.

————————————————————————–

Bunny kept an open mind about working again: “If the right thing came along,” she’d say, “I’d maybe explore the possibility of going back to work.”

As it turns out, she’s a valuable commodity in the workaday world.

She was lead kicking and screaming down a path that resulted in an offer of a job making nearly twice what I make currently.  It was even in the line of work she aspired to be in before we’d even met each other!

I can’t tell you how many prayers, talks, sleepless nights, tears of anguish and refiguring numbers we’ve had between the two of us trying to make a decision on what to do.

We finally decided the opportunity was too good for her to pass up… especially in this economy. 

So, she will start her new job in a little more than a week.

DLG will not go to a day care.  We’ve hired a very nice nanny named Miranda after running her through a gauntlet of questions, checking her background, talking to her friends, following her home, having her spend the day with us and implanting a device in her brain so we can listen to her thoughts.

After everything I’ve said, you may be asking yourself, “Why?  I thought you wanted DLG to be with her mama?”

Well… I do… but after weeks in thought and prayer… we’ve both come to a realization that we’re being led somewhere in completely the opposite direction we had originally planned.

But you’ll have to wait until a later post to see what that is. 

In the meantime, you can keep my beautiful Bunny in your thoughts and prayers.  While for some, it may not seem that difficult to leave their kids in the hands of others… it is tearing Bunny to pieces.  My heart honestly breaks a thousand times over for her.  While the opportunities in this job are there for her to be involved with DLG more than any other job… she still feels like she’s abandoning her post earlier than she had planned. 

I assure her she is not.

There are not enough things I can say in this post about how proud of her I am.  She has been a wife and mother for the ages… and that will never change.

I love you honey.  Thanks for being my hot wife and DLG’s hot mommy.  Thanks for being with a “5” even though you’re a stunning “10”.

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12 responses to “Times Are A-Changin’ (Again)

  1. I came across your blog from a comment you made on mine – first off, I have to tell you that you have a beautiful family. Second, I love your blog – dude, this is great, I’m adding it to my blogroll. One last thing, I’m sorry you missed out on the contest too, but I may have some other “Kick Ass” stuff to give away soon.

    • chriskoenig4324

      Tony… I’m so happy you commented. I friggin’ love your site too. Consider yourself added to my blogroll too… I should’ve done it last night but forgot!

  2. You guys are in my prayers…I love you and I know the Lord sees farther than we can and has His hand covering you! You’re the best parents Story could ever have.

  3. I know how you feel. Val was only out on maternity leave for ~4 months and it was difficult for her. It helped that her dad has come to our house for the last 4 weeks to take care of Mason during the day. He is obviously someone we trust, which is a huge concern. Our new nanny starts tomorrow. While we trust her and feel comfortable with her, it will again be an adjustment for us, as it is someone new to our family. Get flowers and plan on doing a lot of the cooking/cleaning for a while so she can spend a lot of time with DLG in the evenings! Good luck!

  4. Wow, congrats to Bunny, that is awesome. And good luck to all of you on your new direction.

  5. Wow, tears in the eyes. As I have told Bunny, I took off last year from my career to work a few nights a week and be a “stay at home mom” during the day the only way a single mom can! It was the BEST year of my life and I felt I really got to bond with my girls in a way I hadn’t before. Going back to work was hard, horrible, sad, but the three of us will always have that year…no one can take it away! Bunny has done so much for DLG by being home with her, and believe me, you two will be just as great parents when she goes to work. We can always make the best of our circumstances, whatever they might be, and always be great parents in the situation we are in.

    You two are doing fabulous. I will give Bunny extra hugs in these coming weeks 🙂

  6. Hang in there! You two have done a great job with Story so far, and I have no doubt you will continue to do so. The Nanny is an inspired idea, knowing how sick Story got in Day Care, as well as keeping her in a familiar environment while other things change.
    Tell Mindy that being a Mom doesn’t mean she stops being her own person, too. Her own desires and goals are still important, and if she gave up on a dream that she has had for so long, she might end up resenting that adorable little girl. It happens, impossible as it might sound. Since being a SAHM is the most emotionally challenging job ever, sometimes having a job helps you appreciate your little one more. Though in my experience my patience level went down the longer I was away from River, so look out for that.

    But this is the most important thing for Mindy to remember: You can’t be the best Mommy unless you’re taking care of yourself first.

    And, if the Nanny doesn’t work out, then you can be a stay at home Dad with Mindy making all that dough!

  7. Things will work out how they’re meant to.

    I stayed home with my kidlets until they went off to school, and then I decided to finish my degree and get a job.

    If we were to end up with a 3rd at some point, I’d do it all the same.

    Sounds to me that you guys are making the right decision, and honestly, it’s what’s best for your family. Isn’t that all that matters?

    Best wishes!

  8. Hey! Your family is beautiful… especially your wife! no offense. ANyway… I had to go through this same thing. I struggled so much having to leave my two little ones after being home for almost 3 years… but I did it because we felt we had no other choice.

    If you have prayed about it then the decision is the right one.

    Great blog!

    • chriskoenig4324

      Thanks Shelle. Yes I have to agree… I def married up! If you visit my blog frequently… you’ll notice I talk about her ALOT!

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