Day THIRTY(!) of 30 posts in 30 days (holy balls I managed to do it!)
So, here I am on the precipice of finishing the challenge I made to myself one month ago. You know what? There isn’t a lavish parade stampeding by my door. Ed McMahon didn’t raise from the dead to give me $50 million dollars. I didn’t suddenly realize I could speed up my heart rate fast enough to bend a bullet around Angelina Jolie’s face (that’s Wanted… in case you hadn’t seen it).
None of that happened.
In fact… I feel a bit fluffy. No, I don’t mean I feel overweight or a little pudgy. I mean that over these last 30 days I haven’t really written a lot about things of relevance or things that I look back on and say, “Hey… I wrote the shit out of that topic!” In the past, I may have taken me two or three days to get a post together. This gave me time to formulate my thoughts, organize myself, take pictures, scratch my balls… whatever. These 30 days (in amongst everything else I do) consisted of me busting my ass to think of something to write about every day! I must say, it got a little overwhelming and I’m looking forward to not posting something every single day.
I also want to set something straight for you readers and myself as well: I’m a God-fearing individual. Perhaps I don’t make that statement enough. I realize that I curse at times on my posts, I post pictures of my wife and Kim Kardashian (well done God… well done), say things like “scratch my balls” or “punch my testicles” or “I like boobies” and talk about my past that consisted of a lot of boozing and partying. Truth of the matter is… I’m not worthy of the love God displays for me. I’ve been incredibly blessed and that hasn’t been without living through times where I felt like dying.
I don’t feel that writing a scripture passage after every post or having a moral message after every story is particularly endearing to some of my readers who may be atheist or agnostic. I want to reach out to those readers as well. Just because I am a Christian doesn’t mean that I can’t scratch my balls, think Kim Kardashian is hot or talk about my past in a light that may be humorous. I’m not Mr. “Moral Majority” and certainly don’t want to come across that way so I talk about what I want and hope that my occasional post on my faith or my marriage or being a father can reach out to the masses in some small way.
This blog rose out of the ashes that was my life for a while. I was dead. I was lost. I was sincerely hurting. “Hands To War” came from that. My blog title actually comes from scripture! Psalm 18 vs. 32-36 to be exact:
It is God that girdeth me with strength, and maketh my way perfect. He maketh my feet like hinds’ feet, and setteth me upon my high places. He teacheth my hands to war, so that a bow of steel is broken by mine arms. Thou hast also given me the shield of thy salvation: and thy right hand hath holden me up, and thy gentleness hath made me great. Thou hast enlarged my steps under me, that my feet did not slip.
When I was crumbling in my depression, it was He who helped me out. This scripture resonated with me. He helped make me strong. If it had been up to me I would have literally died… and I mean that. I feel that lately, I haven’t credited God with everything that I have. So that’s what I’m doing right now in this post.
Quite frankly people, when you read this blog, you’re reading me… stains and all. I use Hands To War as my creative, emotional and spiritual outlet. It’s up to you whether you want to read it or not.
Thanks for reading these last 30 days. I hope you can look forward to more posts to come (just not every day).