When I was 13 or 14 I cried in Disney’s animated Tarzan. I know… you’re thinking, “Holy mounds of whale dung get ahold of yourself!” I’ve always been somewhat of a sensitive guy. In fact, I’m a card-carrying member of the five “S” group: Strong,Silent, Sexy, Silly, Buoyant and Sensitive. Okay, wait… I mean the five “S” and one “B” group.
Anyway, the list I’ve compiled aren’t “chick flicks”. “Chick Flicks” that are okay for dudes to watch (albeit with your girlfriend or wife) like “The Notebook”, “Time Travelers Wife”, etc., are going to get their own list. These are movies marketed either towards guys or specifically not just ladies. Unless you’re an emotionless tube of diaper cream… these movies have to move you in some way. In any case… these are the TOP FIVE MOVIE’S IN WHICH I SHED A TEAR and not felt like a pansy in doing so!
5. Dead Man Walking
“Dead Man Walking” is about a nun (Susan Saradon) who accepts the very dubious task of being a convicted killer’s (Sean Penn) chaplain the final week of his life before he’s sent to his state-ordered execution.
I remember going to see this movie with my brother and crying so hard that one of my contacts washed back into my eye socket. It took me a good 30 minutes to work the damn thing out. I thought my body was going to just absorb it if I didn’t get it out quickly.
The acting is great in this one. Sean Penn plays a great white-trash P.O.S. and Susan Saradon plays an equally good, saintly nun. They make for a very odd pair… yet the emotions emanating from the both of them the closer it comes to his execution gets you right in the gut. It also doesn’t favor one side over the other (i.e. for the death penalty or against the death penalty) but rather leaves you to make up your own mind.
4. Marley And Me
Adapted from the book written by Josh Groban of the same name, Marley and Me tells the story of the lessons you can learn during the most pivotal moments in your life with “man’s best friend”… even if he can be a total pain in the ass sometimes.
I watched Marley and Me when it came out on video… and it’s a good thing because I may just been the most blubbering doofus in the whole movie theater once the credits rolled. Bunny had fortunately fallen asleep when the end of the movie approached and I was sensing a heart wrenching outcome… so, when the outcome came to fruition… I just let it go. I cried until I was soaking in a puddle of my own tears.
3. The Passion of the Christ
People… Mel Gibson has officially gone absolutly bat-poop crazy…
Now that we’ve gotten that out-of-the-way it shouldn’t detract from the fact that this movie, despite all the controversy surrounding it, is the most realistic movie depicting Jesus’ final hours that’s ever been made. While you may ask yourself, “Why would I want to see all that?” I’ll tell you the answer really is, “You don’t!” but if you never truly understood the agony endured by one man in an effort to prove His point… then you will after watching this movie.
2. Forrest Gump
C’mon… who hasn’t seen Forrest Gump?
With a movie that has more one-liners than Arnold Schwartzenegger’s one-liner resume, Tom Hanks plays Forrest Gump who goes through his whole life loving the same woman unconditionally. During which, he changes the lives of others, meets several US presidents and makes millions of dollars in the shrimpin’ business.
Forrest Gump doesn’t just make grown men cry, it also kept my brother awake for the whole movie… and that’s a huge complement to the movie itself. A movie hardly makes it through the opening credits and he’s asleep. Not in Forrest Gump… it endeared itself to him until the very end.
The most troubling part of this movie being number one on this list is that I don’t even like football! Regardless, Rudy speaks to the inspirational part of all of us despite if we like football or not.
Based on a true story, Rudy was the quintessential underdog: too little, too dumb and too poor to accomplish his dream of playing football for Notre Dame. No one believed in Rudy except for Rudy himself… and by the end of the movie, if you’ve ever wanted to be a major league baseball player an astronaut or Miss America… er… I mean a firefighter then Rudy will have you believing you can do it. All you need is a heart the size of Texas.
Oh yeah… and when Rudy finally plays in his first, last and only Notre Dame football game… I’m standing up, clapping and sobbing like a colicky newborn baby.
What movies (that aren’t “chick flicks”) make you cry?