127 Hours = 2 Hours


“How do you arrive at such a convoluted equation?” You must be asking yourself, “That Papa K must have fallen on his head and knocked a few screws loose!”  Well… if you must know… that’s exactly it.  Allow me to explain:

These last several weeks have been fairly nice in the sense that I don’t have to consistently fire the creative synapses in my brain to come up with a new and creative blog post.  Although, near the beginning of my blogging hiatus I was met with some major issues so perhaps it was good that I took some time off.  Blogging may have pushed me over the proverbial ledge.

I’ve seen a few gory, intense and/or gory AS WELL AS intense movies in my life i.e. Passion of the Christ, Saving Private Ryan, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Saw, Confessions of a Shopoholic, etc.  None affected me as much as “127 Hours”: the new movie based on the true life story of Aron Ralston.  In 2003, Aron found himself trapped when a boulder pinned his arm to the side of the canyon wall.  He was stuck there for 127 hours (thus the movie name) only to finally free himself after cutting his arm off!!! 

Get a load of the trailer:

Intense, right?

I’d been wanting to see the movie for a while and the first real chance that Bunny and I got to go see it happened to be the same day her grandma passed away.  In addition to her grandma passing, the previous ten days had their fair share of intense, high-stress moments for Bunny too so this particular date night needed to be one where we could just “get away” and chill out for a little bit.

Which begs the question: “Why go see a movie about a guy who (after getting trapped under a boulder) is forced to battle his own sanity, drink his own urine and cut off his own arm with a dull knife in order to survive?  That seems to be a little too intense doesn’t it?”

I don’t have an answer for you… it was a stupid call.  We should have gone to see Tron.

Bunny and I sat through the movie on pins and needles.  Aron Ralston was played by James Franco and he nailed the performance.   He nailed it so well that when it came time for him to hack his arm off with his dull knife I found myself slightly hesitant to keep my eyes fixed on the movie screen.  Alas, I kept fixed on the moving picture as long as I could because, c’mon… I’ve never had issues in movies like this before!

Until that moment.

Somewhere between sawing through his nerves and cutting through his tendons with a pair of needle nose pliers, I found myself getting overheated.  I took a deep breath and leaned forward to take off my jacket… Bunny noticed my hesitation at watching the movie.

“I’m hot.  I don’t feel good.” I said.

Visibly freaked out and a little worried she told me go get a drink of water.

As I walked down the movie theater steps, James Franco successfully tore his arm from underneath the boulder and was standing there looking at it still lodged between the canyon wall and the boulder he’d become too familiar with over the last 5+ days.  I, on the other hand, had successfully drained the blood from my head as a result of standing up and walking from the theatre.

As I made my way down the tunnel to the bright lights of the movie theater lobby I braced myself against the wall and its railing.

A few steps from the door to the theater… I blacked out.

When I came to… I was face down on the tile floor near the door leading into the lobby.  I sleepily acknowledged my screaming wife who had come to my rescue after hearing a tremendous crash in the theater tunnel shortly after I disappeared from her sight.

“OH MY GOD CHRIS!! ARE YOU ALRIGHT!!” She cried.

That was a rhetorical question of course.  I was not alright.  I had used every bit of my dead weight when I passed out to slam my chin on the tile floor and split it open.

Now, as I was beginning to regain some of my footing and the room was ceasing to spin, I began to realize that I had hurt myself… and I had a pounding headache.

After a visit from the paramedics, a never-ending barrage of humiliating and unwanted stares and thousands of embarrassed apologies escaping from my lips… Bunny and I were headed to the emergency room to get my chin stitched up.

I needed five of them:

Honestly, I felt worse about screwing up our date night than I did about the stitches I needed or the pounding headache I’d inherited.  I wanted to let my wife escape from the hazards of normal life for a little bit and retreat with me to a land of serenity and relaxation. 

But instead… she wound up in the emergency room for two hours after I passed out watching 127 Hours.

Now you understand why 127 Hours = 2 Hours.

Note to self: no more gory/intense movies.

——————————————————–

Anything like this ever happen to you?  Please say “yes”!  My shattered ego needs a boost.

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13 responses to “127 Hours = 2 Hours

  1. I’ve been wondering what happened to you. Bless your heart! Too much stress and tough daily life happenings can sometimes cause our body and mind to react in odd ways to things that normaly wouldn’t be a big deal. I’m sure that movie just sent you over the edge with all that was going on with you. The last 5-6 months I’ve had more stress then all of my 41 years. I have the ”normal” reaction to stress but now for some reason when something stressful happens I throw up. That’s really embarrassing!!!! I was in the carpool line and got a very stressful phone call. What do you know…. Just as my son was getting in the car…. I’m puking in a Target sack. Dear lord! I’m sure you can imagine the look on the teachers face…. LOL I won’t even go into what Christmas shopping did to me. hahaha Maybe that will make you feel a little better about your black out?!? Sorry you got hurt and needed stitches but I’m glad it wasn’t worse then that! And I’m sorry for the loss of your wifes Grandmother. 😦

  2. OH MY GOD YOU WUSS you should have just superglued it shut. If it works for the guys in the military, can’t you suck it up too?

    I am totally kidding. Sorry you had to get those stitches.

    But now I have to go check out that movie. I have no idea why anyone who works in a wilderness shop and is willing to take so many chances didn’t bring a DECENT POCKET KNIFE or a cell phone or a GPS or something. I know, I know, it’s all just chance happenstance. But still, note to self: If I plan to do some death-defying activities, dont’ be surprised if I die or get arm trapped under a boulder.

    Duly noted.

  3. Not quite. Not me, per se. And, not quite the same as happened to you.

    It was the beach head scene of Saving Private Ryan, and because the wife and I are seated about halfway down the theater she’s getting the full effect of…No, not the gore. It’s not the severed limbs and sundered torsos. She’s falling victim to the shaking, hand-held camera.

    The wife is very susceptible to motion sickness. Car sick, air sick, sea sick, if it moves, she’ll get sick on it. The movie theater isn’t moving but that camera sure is, and we make a dash for the back of the theater so her head can stop spinning. She was like this with Blair Witch, as well, and missed most of that movie (not a big loss, IMO) because she was staring at the floor trying not to be sick.

    After convincing her that I’m pretty sure the shakiness will only be during the beach head scene we return to the theater but take seats in the back row, nearer to the door.

    The guy next to our new seats grins and asks if it got too much for her. Trying not to disturb my fellow movie goers I quickly & briefly try to explain that the wife got motion sick. But I can tell that he doesn’t get it, and just thinks I’m trying to cover up for the wife being “grossed out”. Whatever, guy, let’s just watch the movie.

  4. Dude, that sucks. Sorry to hear that you missed the ending. Well, and the whole fainting and stitches thing.

    I probably shouldn’t see it then, because since Lukas was born I have been prone to fainting spells too.

    Thanks for the warning! glad you are okay.

  5. James Franco was on Ellen this morning. Evidently there have been many people that passed out watching the part of the movie when he cuts off his arm. I have a feeling I shouldn’t see this film. haha

  6. Oh, MAN! That’s has to really suck. That’s one of my fears, to be the guy who has to have the paramedics called for him. I can’t believe it happened to you! But, on a different note, I’ve never heard of that movie, and I only vaguely know of the incident. I would have probably gone to see Tron 🙂

  7. ouch. Well, let’s see. My husband got a splinter in the meaty part of his hand between his thumb and finger. He thought he’d gotten it out, but he was wrong. So like a week later, he says, to his largely preggers and nauseous wife, “oooh, look!” and grunts. And the the splinter pops through the OTHER SIDE OF HIS HAND. And cue wife grabbing onto door frame as she slips to the floor.
    Sarah got her finger slammed in the bedroom door. I was good, no problems. We went to the ER, waited for.ev.er. The came in w/ the stitches finally. Sarah was all interested. They turned the hot lamp on over us to see. And again, cue the momma tipping over onto the bed.
    Good times, good times. So maybe *I* didn’t end up w/ stitches . . .but your’s makes for a better story!

  8. Yes, it has. The one and only time I have blacked out in my life happened a couple of years ago after a long night of drinking with a friend. The next morning we were standing in a breakfast buffet line, hungover, and the next thing I know I am looking up at a crowd of people hovering over me and a HUGE whelp on the back of my head. I was so scared because nothing like that has ever happened to me before! Mine wasn’t due to anything graphic, but I remember feeling hot, sick to my stomach and then…nothing.

    Glad you’re okay!

  9. The only time I remember actually fainting was when I was 6 months pregnant with Matt (he was always SUCH a trouble maker! haha!)It is not a pleasant experience. Mighty glad that your Dad caught me before I had a little more than stiches (like a preemie).

    Needless to say, I will not be going to see this movie.

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